One Day at a Time
by Esme
Summary: There are times when the only way to take life is one day at a time.


Title: One Day at a Time  
Author: Esme  
Date: 21st October 1999  
Category: ??  
  
Disclaimer: I do not own anything associated with Water Rats. The characters in this story that you recognise probably belong to Hal McElroy, Southern Star and the Nine Network. If there are characters you do not recognise, then they belong to me [so don't steal them unless you ask me first].  
  
Author's Notes: I know I said that I wasn't going to be sending any more fics for a while but ... Today was a public holiday, and even thought that's a great opportunity to get a lot of work done, I decided to stuff studying and do something enjoyable. So I wrote this fic. it's another one with Frank out on his boat and thinking about things/talking to Goldie.  
  
The song lyrics are from "Tomorrow Never Comes". I was watching it again the other day and this song is in the middle when Frank is getting the boat all ready. and I thought it was such a nice song and I was surprised that no one had ever used it in a fic before. so I used it. I'm not really sure if I like this fic or not, but I'd love to know what you think, so feedback would be funky and all that at erinwilson@trump.net.au  
  
  
  
  
  
--  
One Day at a Time  
--  
  
  
  
*~*~*~*  
I didn't think we'd ever find  
The promised land  
The promised land  
  
But if we took a little time  
You might take my hand  
You'd take my hand  
*~*~*~*  
  
  
You know, I never expected us to be a perfect couple, but I thought that maybe we were meant to be together. You and I were both married to our job, and sometimes it seemed as though we could have been married to each other.   
  
I never knew if you loved me and I was always too scared to say anything. Our friendship was so amazing that I didn't want to risk it. I didn't want to know the truth - in case it hurt. It was just safer not to know. Remember when I proposed to you? Yeah, I was drunk at the time, but I did sort of mean it. If I'd been sober I probably wouldn't have suggested marriage - I wasn't ready for that much commitment. I loved you and I was trying to protect you, but you didn't appreciate it at the time.  
  
I was serious when I asked you to come with me - just you and me and the open sea. You did take me seriously about it and I was glad about that. I knew what your answer would be. I knew that you couldn't come, but I had to ask. I had to let you know that I wanted you to come. I had to say something before I left or I would have regretted it forever.   
  
  
*~*~*~*  
But I got nothing, but tomorrow  
Maybe that's more than I deserve  
*~*~*~*  
  
  
Now I just sit here day after day. Just me and the open sea - it gets a bit lonely sometimes . I think about you a lot. I think about what it would have been like if you had come with me. And I think about what it would have been like if I'd stayed. I think about what it would be like if I'd never left you crying.   
  
Oh God Rachel - you'll never know how hard that was for me. I thought I could handle anything, I thought that I'd been through all the hard experiences of my life. But sailing away from you was the hardest thing I have ever had to do. It took all my strength and courage not to turn back and run to you and just hold you. But I just knew that this trip, this adventure, was something that had to be done - no matter how hard it was. And I'm eternally sorry if you got hurt in the process, because I would never want to hurt you.   
  
I guess I've had enough time to think about everything out here. I've thought about all the times as a cop when I thought that my life was over. That was just one of those things about that job, you never knew what could happen. You just had to take each day as it came, hoping that today wouldn't be the day when you met an angry crim with a knife. You know, there were so many times when I thought that all I had was tomorrow, but now I think what if tomorrow never comes?   
  
  
*~*~*~*  
One day a voice inside you wakes  
And calls your name  
It calls your name  
  
Now I must pay for my mistakes  
But you're not to blame  
You're not to blame  
*~*~*~*  
  
  
Rachel if tomorrow doesn't ever come, if I never see you again, then I hope you know that I love you. Out here I've had to live with the fact that I never really told you how I felt. I guess you could say that's my one regret. It was a mistake that I made, but I've well and truly paid for it by not knowing how you felt. It's not your fault, it's mine.   
  
I just spend my days sailing. Hoping that one day I'll get back to Sydney, and you'll still be there. Hoping that one day I'll get to see you again and I'll have the guts to tell you how I feel. Who knows what will happen. I could just turn around right now and sail back home, but somehow I don't think that would be fair to myself. I've just got to hope that one day I'll end up back in Sydney - and you'll remember who I am. All I know is that I can't plan what's going to happen, I can't plan how this adventure of mine is going to take place. I guess I've just got to take it one day at a time.   
  
  
  
*~*~*~*  
END  
  
  
  
  
  
okay, hit that reply button!! feedback - erinwilson@trump.net.au  



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